


Puppy School

by cafephan



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Dogs, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2019-07-07 10:28:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 15,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15906438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cafephan/pseuds/cafephan
Summary: Phil has a five month old Labrador puppy, Thor. He struggles to control him, leading to his parents booking him onto a bulk of puppy training classes, which are led by Dan.





	1. One

Phil Lester leads a good life. Great family, a few great close friends, his own cosy flat, a nice, steady job at the local library.

And of course, Thor. The five month old Labrador he recently adopted, the light of his life. Who also happens to just be kind of a terror. He dotes on his puppy, he really, truly does, but his puppy is reckless in return. It’s almost always playful, never malicious, he just thinks everyone wants to play and everything is his to pick up and chew and barks at basically everything he sees, which Phil assumed was just the puppy-ness in him, but was soon informed that Thor took it to a whole new level.

When his parents turned up one day with a pre-paid bulk of puppy training classes for him to attend, he was conflicted between sobbing graciously at their feet and being insulted that they insinuated that he can’t control his dog. Which he can’t, but that’s not the point.

But he still decides to go.

The classes are held in the community centre of a nearby town. It’s nothing special, essentially seems like just one big box. He appears to be the first one there, a staggering twenty minutes early, and stands outside clutching Thor’s lead as if his life depends on it.

One by one the other attendees arrive, most of the dogs trotting in like they own the place, each and every one getting barked at and nearly pounced on by Thor, much to Phil’s horror. An elderly couple scowl at him as they usher in their Cavalier Spaniel, and a young brunette freckled woman smiles warmly as she enters with her Corgi, after letting it stare and strain to get to Thor for a few seconds.

Phil tries not to make eye contact with anyone else as he brings up the rear and drags Thor inside after everyone else, and stands at the back of the queue. He accidentally drops the lead as he fumbles around in his coat pocket for Thor’s vaccination documents, and the Labrador immediately begins bounding over to a Golden Retriever, jumping in front of it in a ready-to-play stance. The Retriever doesn’t even look in his direction, his attention focused solely on the treat in his owner’s hand.

He stumbles over his feet as he runs over to pick up the lead again, but someone beats him to it.

“I assume this guy’s yours?”

A brunet man around Phil’s age holds the lead out to him with a wide smile. He’s wearing a maroon shirt with the company’s logo on it, and Phil already wants to hit his head repeatedly against the wall. He’s making amazing first impressions on everyone he’s meeting during this class, the trainer included.

“Yeah,” Phil replies, feeling all the heat rush to his cheeks. “This is Thor.”

At hearing his name, Thor jumps up at Phil and pants excitedly, and the man laughs.

“I was excited to meet this one,” he says as he crouches down to Thor’s level. “With a name like this I had a feeling you’d be special.”

“There’s no denying he’s special.” Phil pulls his dog away from stealing the nearby Spaniel’s treat, and the man grimaces.

“At least you’re in the right place.”

Phil nods and heads back to his place in the queue, still feeling awkward beyond words and wishing that he’d taken his mum and his brother’s offer of attending the class with him.

He finds himself stealing frequent glances at the teacher – which he’s decided he’s referring to the trainers as, this is essentially puppy school after all – and he’s sure that the guy’s name is Dan based on the emails that his mum had forwarded him after booking the classes. His name suits him.

Dan the smiling brunet dog trainer, also one of the only people who hasn’t laughed or rolled their eyes upon hearing Thor’s name.

Eventually he reaches the front of the queue and hands over Thor’s documents to Dan’s colleague, a petite woman with her hair tied into careful braids. She hands them back with a wide smile and hands him the welcome booklet, which he of course drops and struggles to pick back up as Thor is straining to run over to the Corgi, which is staring him down from across the room.

Thor continues to bark at the top of his lungs even as Phil sits him down on the floor, he springs straight back up and pulls on the lead to get to any dog he can. Phil purposefully sits at the end of the line, but that means sitting next to the Corgi puppy – which he overhears being called Toffee – which means he has no chance of calming down.

When Dan’s colleague Zoe stands to address everyone, Thor continues to bark at Toffee and Toffee barks back only once before turning her attention back to Zoe like most if not all of the other dogs. Dan dashes over and takes Thor’s lead and takes him over to the other side of the room, where he sits in the corner with Thor on his lap and pets him softly until the puppy is practically asleep. Phil doesn’t hear a word Zoe says as he’s watching his dog, which seems like a completely different dog, perfectly content and quiet. Dan grins over at him and shoots him a thumbs up, to which Phil can barely smile, he’s too shocked.

Zoe finishes her introduction and hands over to Dan, who brings Thor back over and hands the lead to Phil with another smile, and Thor immediately sits then lays on the floor, his head on Phil’s foot.

Phil looks from Dan to Thor then back again.

“How did you do that?”

Dan laughs, as do a handful of the other dog owners in the room.

“It’s okay,” Dan crouches to pat Thor’s head then meets Phil’s gaze. “We have time.”


	2. Two

Dan walks over to the front of the room, and his gaze passes over all of the dogs sat at their owners’ feet, his smile growing as he does so.

“Okay, we’re going to start off simple. We’ll go through the structure and content of the course in a bit, but for now I just want to see how you all walk your dogs.” He again looks at all of the dogs, and puts his hands on his knees and smiles down at the Golden Retriever, who is chewing through a treat. “Bayley, please.”

One of Bayley’s owners steps up to the front of the room with him. The man’s wife immediately gets out her phone, ready to record.

“Just walk him as you normally would, please.” Dan takes a step back and watches as the man walks Bayley around the room. Phil watches as Bayley obediently walks at the man’s side for the most part, never more loyal than when a treat is shown to him. Zoe, sat behind the table in the corner of the room, writes on a notepad as she observes.

“Very well done, thank you,” Dan smiles as the man and Bayley sit back down, and Dan turns to the Cavalier Spaniel. “Skye, please.”

The elderly woman begins to walk Skye around. As she passes where Thor was peacefully laying at Phil’s feet, he jumps up and attempts to pounce towards her, the elderly woman immediately yanking Skye back in a frenzied panic.

“He won’t hurt her!” Phil attempts damage control as he desperately tries to get his puppy under control, but Thor is having none of it, his tongue lolls out of his mouth as he barks and pants to get towards Skye, showing no signs of stopping.

“Keep him under control!” The woman shouts back, and the harsh tone makes Phil feel a little sick in his stomach.

“In his defence,” Dan says calmly as he walks over, “He is in a puppy training class. We’re all here to get our puppies under control.” He crouches down and begins petting Thor in the manner he was previously, and within a few seconds the Labrador’s manic barking and whining have begun to subside. “Please continue.”

The woman mumbles something to herself and continues walking Skye around in a circle. Phil can feel her husband’s gaze burning into the side of his head from the other end of the line.

“Try not to let it get to you,” the young woman sat beside Phil leans over. “Just because our dogs have a little personality, it’s not a bad thing.”

Phil smiles at her weakly, then looks back down to where Thor is resting his head on Dan’s lap.

“It’s really not a bad thing, you know,” Dan says quietly, “Dogs with personality are the best kind of dogs if you ask me.”

“Thanks,” Phil says to both of them, and Dan gently rests Thor back on the floor and stands to address the group once more.

“Very nice, Skye,” he smiles over to the elderly couple, and turns to the woman beside Phil. “Toffee, please.”

Toffee stands beside her owner and growls towards Thor, and Phil holds his breath as he waits for Thor to respond, but he doesn’t. He simply nuzzles into Dan and yawns.

The woman begins walking Toffee around, and for the most part she remains under control, only occasionally jumping up her owner’s legs and the woman gently taps her head to get her back down each time, and she brings Toffee to a sitting position once they’re done.

“Very nice, thank you,” Dan smiles as they return, and Dan gently moves Thor’s head and stands up. “Time to shine, little Thor.”

And so Phil begins to walk Thor around the room, and gets about three steps in when Thor pulls a little too hard and the lead slips from where it was looped around Phil’s hand, and bounds over to Toffee, and begins pawing at her, wanting to play.

Almost instinctively the elderly woman picks up Skye and places her on her lap, and her husband once more looks over in disapproval at Phil, and shakes his head slowly.

“I’m so sorry!” Phil dashes over and tries his hardest to regain control of Thor. “Bad boy, no!”

Toffee grumbles and doesn’t respond to Thor’s invitation to play, and her owner reaches over to gently stroke the top of Thor’s head.

“It’s okay,” she says, “He only wants to play, we both know he means no harm.” She slips a small treat into Toffee’s mouth, and the Corgi visibly eases.

“Try again,” Dan says softly from his position at the head of the room, “Just keep a tighter grip of the lead this time.”

Zoe is still scribbling things down as she observes, and she sends a supportive smile as Phil begins his second attempt to walk Thor around the room. He’s shaking the entire time, and Thor still pulls to get to the other dogs, but they manage a lap of the room with no more drastic accidents.

Dan then announces that he and Zoe will be speaking to each owner individually to give feedback, and the other owners should use the time to take their dogs outside should they need to before the next part of the training commences.

As Dan and Zoe begin talking to Bayley’s owners and the elderly couple take Skye outside, Toffee’s owner turns to Phil with a welcoming smile.

“He’s so fucking cute!” She coos, and scratches Thor’s head, the Labrador immediately lapping up the attention and attempting to jump at her legs, to which she laughs. “How old is he?”

“Five months,” Phil replies, and nods towards Toffee. “What about this princess?”

“Five months too, actually!” She feeds Toffee another treat and holds out her other hand. “I’m Dodie, by the way. I feel like we should get introductions out of the way considering it seems like it’s us versus everyone else.”

“Phil,” he introduces and shakes her hand lightly. “And it’s kind of my fault, I have the troublemaker of the class and you’re just roped in with us because you’re the only one who doesn’t resent us for it.” He begins stroking Thor’s belly to calm him, which works after a few seconds, temporarily distracted.

“It’s our pleasure, really.” Dodie smiles down at Toffee, who is now stretched out on the floor, laying on her belly.

“It seems like they kind of have a love/hate relationship going on,” Phil jokes, and Dodie laughs.

“Sounds like every relationship I’ve ever had, to be honest.”

It’s Phil’s turn to laugh, and he relaxes into his seat as they make polite conversation until it’s Dodie’s turn to receive her feedback, during which time Phil takes Thor outside as to not intrude and listen in.

When they return a few minutes later, Zoe and Dan are waiting for him, and greet him with smiles. Dodie and Toffee leave to give them privacy just as Phil did for them.

“Here’s the challenge of the class,” Zoe says as she crouches to fuss over Thor, and the puppy licks her hand. “But for the record, don’t let anyone get to you with what they say or the side glances, you are in puppy training, after all, it’s the best place for him.”

“He does need a lot of work, I won’t lie, he needs to learn how to control himself around other dogs and people and needs to learn to walk on the left, we’ll work on the bare basics first.” Dan also fusses over Thor.

“I’m really sorry.”

“Don’t be, like Zoe said, you’re in the right place.” Dan smiles. “Besides, the email said you only got him recently, right?”

“Yeah, in the past few weeks.”

“So you’re already at a disadvantage!” Zoe reassures him. “Everyone else except Toffee has been with their owners since they were born so they’ve had much more time to bond, you’re not to blame for him being a little hyperactive, he’s getting used to his new life.”

“He was kept in a cage by his previous owner, I was told.” Phil bites his lip and feeds Thor a treat to keep him as calm as he can.

Dan visibly tenses, and Zoe shakes her head.

“He probably never thought he’d have a life like this, neither of you are to blame for his behaviour.” Zoe smiles down at the puppy.

“He’ll have missed out on his formative stage for socialisation and behaviour, he’s essentially a newborn in a five month old body in some ways.” Dan gets to his feet. “But we’ll work on it, try not to worry too much, yeah?”

“It’ll be okay, we know what we’re doing,” Zoe says as she also gets to her feet. “We’ll do everything we possibly can.”

Dan smiles and nods, and they both excuse themselves to go and talk in the corner of the room, waiting until the other owners all return.

“That could’ve been a lot worse,” Phil says to Thor (but mostly himself) and feeds him another treat and strokes the top of his head.

Phil notices that Dan keeps smiling over at him as he and Zoe chat, and it does wonders to help reassure him. Zoe then leaves to speak to some of the other owners, and Dan takes a seat behind the table Zoe was sat at during the demonstrations. He smiles again, then drops his gaze and attention to the pad Zoe was writing in.

Phil looks down at Thor, and his puppy stares back up at him and jumps to lick at his chin, which he blames entirely for the comforting warmth currently blossoming in the pit of his stomach.


	3. Three

He somehow manages to get through the rest of the session with minimal embarrassment. Or, rather, he’s already beyond the point of embarrassment with Thor’s constant barking, whining and straining to get to the other dogs that it’s not really affecting him anymore.

Toffee has seemed to warm to Thor as the session has gone on, and Phil wonders if it’s because she can sense that Dodie feels comfortable around him, so Toffee feels she can feel comfortable around Thor now too.

He then goes on to wonder if that’s similar to why Thor is so comfortable around Dan.

But Dan and Zoe are both professional dog trainers, so obviously dogs will feel comfortable around them quickly. To think it’s anything personal is stupid, or, as his brother puts it, laughable.

Martyn and Cornelia are staying with Phil’s parents for a while, and Phil skypes them all that night to relay about the first session.

“Mum _would_ book the dog trainer you fall in love with at first sight,” Martyn laughs, “I fucking love it.”

“Martyn!” Kath swats his arm lightly and rolls her eyes, and Martyn laughs and walks off camera. “But it went okay?”

“They obviously don’t think I can control him,” Phil looks down at Thor, who has his head in Phil’s lap whilst happily chewing on a bone. “They said neither of us are to blame, though.”

“Which you’re not,” Cornelia says with a sympathetic smile. “It’s neither of your faults that he started out his life under the rule of evil bastards.”

At this, Kath and Nigel both send her a curious glance, as does Phil through the webcam, and Cornelia shakes her head and smiles.

“Sorry, I’ve been watching too much trash tv lately, it’s beginning to take its toll.”

She excuses herself and Phil is left with his parents.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come to the next one with you?” Kath asks with that same warm motherly smile. “We could make a day of it, a weekend, even?”

Nigel laughs and nudges his wife’s shoulder. “He can handle it. But if you want to go and see him you don’t need a reason, you know.”

Kath nudges him back. “I’m not doing it for that! I’m offering my son some help!”

Seeing his parents’ petty squabble calms the churning of doubt in Phil’s stomach, and he laughs. “I’ll be fine, mum, really. But you can come and see us anytime.”

“I know that!” Kath replies in a higher pitch than before, and her cheeks have reddened significantly. “I’m going to get dinner started.”

She promptly ducks out and Nigel laughs again.

“You’ll be okay, Phil.” he says in a calm, unwavering tone. His sincerity almost makes Phil believe it. “It just takes time, like anything. Don’t be afraid to ask those trainers for extra help if you feel you need it though, it’s their job to get Thor trained.”

“I will, dad. Thanks.”

The call ends with an exchange of I love you’s between Phil and everyone except Martyn – they choose to flip each other off with a grin instead – and Phil flops back onto his bed, and Thor immediately crawls onto his belly and settles instantly. Phil begins absentmindedly running his fingers through Thor’s fur as he stares at the ceiling, lost in thought.

\--

He wakes up a few hours later, Thor long gone and the sun almost completely set. Clearly it’s later than Phil usually takes Thor on his final walk of the day.

He finds his dog in the living room innocently chewing on the same bone as earlier, surrounded by ripped shreds of one of the books that was originally laying on the bookcase.

Thor immediately jumps up and bounds over, jumping up Phil’s legs as tall as he can go, and Phil pats his head lightly, and goes to the kitchen to fetch a bag with a sigh and begins picking up the scraps whilst Thor finds himself fascinated with the bag and tries to claw at it. And succeeds, tearing a hole in the thin material and the scraps Phil spent minutes upon minutes picking up spill all over the floor again. Phil leaves the room squeezing the bridge of his nose whilst Thor is rolling in the paper.

After five minutes of struggling to get Thor’s harness on, they’re out on the final walk, around the block and across the nearby playing field as usual, with the hopes no children have decided to stay out on a school night.

Which, of course, they have, so Phil has to make a detour for the sake of his arm not being pulled out of its socket. Though he needs to work on his commands for next week’s class, he just doesn’t have the energy today. So he allows Thor to pull him along and guide him where he wants to go, and when they finally arrive back home, he climbs into bed without a second thought and falls asleep straight away despite the earlier involuntary nap.

\--

Leaving the next morning for his shift was a struggle. Thor sensed he was leaving so ran to the front door before Phil could get there, every single time. It took countless treats, a new toy and a ball throw to finally get the few precious seconds to slip out of the door and head to the library.

He doubts he’s ever had a slower moving shift. Despite the customer flow being just as typical as ever, for some reason time just doesn’t move. He gets all the daily tasks out of the way in an hour when they should take a few, checks everyone out in record time, puts away all the books as if on instinct, and it all seems to be done instantly. Whilst putting away the books he picks up a dog training guide and takes it behind the desk and begins skimming through it in an attempt to speed up time.

“Having fun there?”

A familiar voice startles him, and sends the book falling off of his lap onto the floor.

“Didn’t mean to startle you,” Dan smiles as Phil, ever flustered, drops the book onto the desk after picking it up and tries to cover it with his hands. “There’s no harm in it, you don’t have to hide it from me.”

He gently slides the book over to himself and begins skimming through it.

“Just be careful, a lot of these books have older methods of teaching and might conflict with what Zoe and I teach you.”

“Older methods?”

Dan glances up from the book to meet Phil’s gaze.

“Some condone hitting and slapping.”

Phil almost recoils in horror.

“I know, right?” Dan closes the book and slides it back over to Phil. “Obviously you’re free to do whatever you want but my and Zoe’s methods haven’t led us to fail a dog yet.”

“I trust you,” Phil feels it’s almost an instinct to reply, but he’s sure he manages to keep his cool. “Or, rather, Thor trusts you.”

Dan grins. “With a name like that, it’s an absolute honour.”

“He’s your favourite Avenger too?”

Dan rests one of his hands on the desk and shrugs. “Wouldn’t kick him out of bed.”

Phil doesn’t know how to respond. Either to the statement or to the fact Dan just alluded to liking guys. Possibly. Though, as he rationalises, this is a guy he met yesterday, and he knows nothing about. But the fact they both wouldn’t kick a guy out of bed gives Phil a small sense of accomplishment and he attributes it to just wanting to impress his dog’s trainer so he won’t give up on Thor.

When Dan scratches the back of his neck, Phil realises he’s been silent for too long and the conversation has simmered out.

“Yeah, so can you tell me where the historic novels are? I told my mum I’d look for this specific one she’s been after because my hometown’s library was beyond shit and didn’t have anything beyond battered comics and romance novels with stuck together pages.”

Phil just blinks at him, wondering if Dan means what he thinks it means, and the brunet nods slowly.

“Yeah, it’s exactly what you think.”

Phil pulls back his lips in a disgusted grimace, and holds out his hand to direct Dan to the right, and slips out from behind the desk to guide him. Dan continues to laugh at his expression as they walk over to the historic novels.

He waits patiently as Dan scans the shelves for the book he’s looking for, and it startles him when Dan yanks a book out with a triumphant stomp of his foot.

“Found it?” Phil asks, and Dan turns to him and holds out the book.

“I’m going to be the favourite son for sure, now,” Dan smiles and they walk back over to the front desk and Phil checks it out for him. “I knew moving here would be good for something.”

“You just moved here?”

Dan tucks the book into his backpack and slings it over his shoulder. “Last month.”

“I’m surprised we haven’t run into each other in Tesco or something, everyone always runs into everyone in this town. I’ve run into the same person four times in the same week before in the cereal aisle.”

Dan laughs and runs a hand through his hair. “Cereal fanatic are you?”

“You could say I’m _cerealously_ a fanatic.”

Phil regrets it as soon as he says it, but Dan finds it hilarious. So hilarious that if it was any other customer and one he wasn’t in conversation with, he’d be forced to shush them.

“That was fucking awful, oh my god,” Dan says eventually after his laughter subsides. He opens his mouth to speak again, but his phone pinging in his pocket distracts him, and when he pockets it again, he looks to Phil with a sad smile. “As much as I’d love to stay and swap awful puns, I have to get going.”

“Of course, I’ll see you next week.” Phil smiles and raises his hand in a wave, which Dan replicates.

“If I don’t see you in the cereal aisle first.” Dan smirks and waves again before leaving, and Phil sits back in his chair and picks up the dog training guide once more, but places it on the trolley to be put back on the shelf at a later date.

He glances to the clock, and is taken aback by the fact it’s already nearly the end of his shift, and also by the fact he’s suddenly really craving cereal.


	4. Four

“Okay, I didn’t think you actually meant it.”

The box of Shreddies Phil was holding goes tumbling to the ground at the sound of Dan’s voice.

“You can’t just sneak up on a guy like that!”

Dan walks towards him, swinging his empty basket as he does so.

“ _Au contraire_ ,” he bends down and picks up Phil’s previous Shreddies box and drops it into his own basket. “I very much can.”

“Speaking in another language doesn’t give you the right to be an ass.” Phil picks another box of Shreddies off of the shelf and drops it into his basket.

“Oh, I’m an ass, am I?” Dan retorts and dramatically places a hand on his hip. “Do you _want_ Thor to fail his training classes?”

At this, Phil freezes, and looks down at his feet. When Dan bursts into laughter, Phil snaps his head up and glares at him.

“See? An ass.”

“Never had any complaints about it before,” Dan replies, and turns around. “See you in training!” He waves over his shoulder and leaves down another aisle.

Phil quickly finishes his shopping – making sure to avoid Dan at all costs – and hurries home to Thor.

\--

It’s a long few days up until the next training session.

Thor, as expected, only listens when he wants to listen, and Phil turns up at the training session with his head hung low and embarrassment already everpresent.

Dodie is already waiting outside, Toffee sat patiently at her feet, but jumps up as soon as she spots Thor, who immediately pulls to get to her.

“Tough week?” Dodie asks whilst petting Toffee on the head, a reward for not responding to Thor’s provocation.

“You could say that,” Phil replies, and tugs Thor back over to him and tries – but fails – to get him to sit. “I ran into Dan twice in the same day.”

Dodie grimaces for a second. “How was that?”

“Awkward,” Phil shrugs, “But it was okay, the first time was at my work and the second was in the shop after I made a joke about running into people in the cereal aisle.”

“Love can blossom in the cereal aisle,” Dodie smirks, and Phil rolls his eyes.

“Is that from experience?”

Dodie laughs. “Yes I was seduced once right in front of the Rice Krispies and then we kissed against the Cornflakes.”

Phil blinks. “Wait really?”

Dodie laughs again, and Toffee looks up at her. “No, not really,” she leans down to pet Toffee once more and begins walking her inside. “Being seduced in the cereal aisle, could you imagine?”

Phil walks behind her with Thor attempting to pull in front. “Some people might be into it.”

“Is that from experience?” Dodie teases, calling over her shoulder.

Phil laughs and the two settle in and chat until everyone else arrives.

\--

“He’s a rambunctious little scamp, isn’t he?” Zoe coos down at Thor after he fails to walk patiently beside Phil on his journey around the room.

“Yeah, rambunctious, that’s exactly what I’d say,” Phil replies, and feels the heat rush to his face.

Zoe laughs and Dan, stood beside her, writes something down in the notebook he’s holding.

“He’ll get there!” Zoe pats Thor’s head. “That’s why you’re here, after all!”

Dan smiles at him as the two trainers pass and move onto the next dog to give the feedback.

“It’s going to be a long hour,” Phil says down to Thor, who simply tilts his head to the side in confusion.

\--

It _was_ a long hour. Thor refused to obey Phil at every opportunity, whereas all the other dogs had made a notable improvement from the week before. He practically ran out of the door as soon as Zoe announced the session was over, not even looking back to say goodbye to anyone. Thankfully, he and Dodie had made plans to walk their dogs together on Wednesday, starting at a park that was a reasonable compromise of distance from both of their houses.

Whilst Phil is cooking dinner and Thor is chewing happily on a bone on the sofa, his phone pings with a new text message, which he ignores until he’s done, assuming it’s his mum letting him know it’s okay to call her whenever he’s ready.

After feeding Thor and finally being able to sit down to eat his own food, he checks his phone.

**From: [Unknown]:**

**hi**

Phil sighs, wrong number texts never put him in the best of moods. It mainly stems from when he was in university and was waiting for a text from a guy to confirm their date, and when he got a text from an unknown number he jumped at the chance to confirm it, coming across more than a little keen, but it turned out to be a complete stranger. He was understandably mortified, and still to this day has a grudge against wrong number texts, so he deletes it and practically throws his phone on the table and takes an exaggerated bite of his food.

Thor walks over and places his head on Phil’s knee, silently begging for food, and only gives up when Phil tempts him away with a handful of treats.

“Please go to sleep,” he begs, and Thor ignores him and walks back over and once again places his head on Phil’s knee, and attempts to get to the food, which Phil only just manages to hold out of his reach.

**From: [Unknown]:**

**phil?**

With the knowledge that it isn’t a wrong number text, a chill runs down his spine. He desperately tries to rack his brain as to who he gave his number to recently, but no-one rings a bell. So he hesitantly begins to type.

**To: [Unknown]:**

**Who is this?**

The three dots appear and disappear multiple times, and the bubble of anxiety in Phil’s stomach only continues to grow.

**From: [Unknown]:**

**your worst nightmare.**

He begins to type without even thinking.

**To: [Unknown]:**

**Excuse me?**

Thor barks at the sound of a passing car, and the sudden noise breaking the tense silence nearly causes Phil to fall out of his chair. He strokes the top of Thor’s head in an attempt to calm himself as he watches the typing bubble appear and disappear, and he feels a cold sweat on the horizon.

**From: [Unknown]:**

**jk it’s dan**

**From: [Unknown]:**

**your phone number was on the application form**

**To: [Dan]:**

**So you decided to troll me?**

**From: [Dan]:**

**you already call me an ass so i thought why not have some fun with it**

**To: [Dan]:**

**So you just proved my point**

**From: [Dan]:**

**guess so**

**From: [Dan]:**

**but anyway i just wanted to check you were good bc you were really quiet in training today**

**To: [Dan]:**

**Mainly just embarrassment because it seems like everyone is making progress whereas Thor is just going backwards**

**From: [Dan]:**

**all dogs train at different paces, don’t hold it against yourself, it’s not a reflection of you as an owner**

**From: [Dan]:**

**just focus on teaching him the stuff we went through today and then next week if there’s still no improvement then we’ll take things from there**

**To: [Dan]:**

**You really think he can do it?**

**From: [Dan]:**

**of course**

**From: [Dan]:**

**he’s an amazing dog and you’re an amazing owner, it’s just taking him a while longer, probs because of his past with his old owners**

**From: [Dan]:**

**nothing to do with you**

**To: [Dan]:**

**I’ll trust you, you are the expert**

**From: [Dan]:**

**and don’t u forget it**

**From: [Dan]:**

**but if you’re ever really really struggling you can text me**

**To: [Dan]:**

**Are you sure?**

**From: [Dan]:**

**i wouldn’t offer if i didn’t mean it**

**To: [Dan]:**

**Thank you, really**

**From: [Dan]:**

**no probs have a good night**

**To: [Dan]:**

**You too!**

Things get easier after they finish texting. Thor gets tired and goes straight to his bed and falls asleep in record time, and Phil takes the chance to turn off all the lights and go to his room, and falls asleep quickly himself with a strange, light feeling in his stomach.


	5. Five

“You’ve been texting our dog trainer?” Dodie asks as they’re walking through the park.

Phil debated whether or not to even tell her, but decided to as it’s not like it’s anything to be ashamed of. Dan was just concerned, that’s all, he’d do it for any of the owners.

“Apparently I was really quiet in the last session so he wanted to check I was okay.”

Dodie leans down to feed Toffee a treat, and she looks back to Phil with a raised eyebrow. “You seemed fine to me.”

Phil shrugs. “I thought I was too.” Which is obviously a lie, but Dodie doesn’t have to know that.

“You know,” she continues, “I doubt he’d do that even if someone missed a session.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Phil asks, voice slightly louder as he’s now behind Dodie as Thor decides to stop and pee.

“Nothing, if you don’t want it to,” Dodie replies, turning around to grin at him. Toffee sits patiently at her feet. “But everything if you want it to.”

“Are you trying to set us up?”

Dodie laughs. “I don’t know either of you well enough for that, come on. Besides, you could both be in committed relationships for all I know.”

“We’re not,” Phil replies almost too quickly, and Dodie’s eyes widen for a second. “We’ve talked about it.”

Dodie wraps Toffee’s lead around her wrist so she can place her hand on her hip. “You’ve… discussed your relationship statuses?”

Phil, not knowing what else to do, looks down at the ground and lets Thor pull him off in front.

“He’s kind of cute though, don’t you think?” accompanies Dodie and Toffee’s footsteps as they run to catch up, and Dodie nudges Phil’s arm.

“Stop whatever you’re doing.” Phil laughs and nudges her arm in return.

“Fine,” she sighs. “Just be prepared for me to be watching with eagle eyes in the next training session.”

“What about, you know, your dog?”

As if she knows they’re talking about her, Toffee barks excitedly and jumps up Dodie’s legs.

“She’s actually ahead in everything right now, so we’re good.”

“I thought we were proud owners of the two class delinquents?”

Dodie pets Toffee’s head and feeds her a treat. “We were, but now _you’re_ the owner of the _only_ class delinquent and I’m the observer.”

“I’m going to ask to go in a different class,” Phil glares jokingly at Dodie, who pats his shoulder.

“There’s only one, my dear, dear friend. And as the lessons go on my lighthearted teasing will too.”

Dodie then links her free arm through Phil’s and (thankfully) drops the topic as they talk about all manner of other random topics, and only part when the sky begins to darken and they realise they’ve lost track of time.

\--

“Okay, now we’re going to try recall.” Zoe looks at all the dogs in turn. “Skye, please.”

The elderly woman walks to the front of the room with Skye and tests her recall, to which Skye runs over and sits in front of her without her even needing to ask. The woman clips Skye’s lead back onto her collar and feeds her a treat, and they sit back down whilst Zoe and Dan both praise them.

“Please not me, please not me,” Phil says to himself as Zoe looks down the line again.

“Bayley, please.”

Phil lets out a sigh of relief, but his stomach drops slightly when Bayley, just like Skye, executes his recall perfectly, and his owners sit back down with big smiles, and once again Zoe and Dan praise them.

“Toffee, please.”

Dodie jumps up from her seat and walks to the front of the room with a huge smile, and leaves Toffee with Zoe whilst she walks to the back wall, and stretches out her arms.

“Toffee, come!” Dodie calls confidently, and Toffee spins around at the sound of her voice.

Zoe stands to her feet to eliminate a distraction, and Toffee begins to run across the room. She stops halfway to turn around to look at Thor, who is barking at her as normal. Phil glances to Dodie who presses her lips together for a second then calls Toffee again, and the corgi runs the rest of the way and sits patiently at Dodie’s feet, and allows her to clip back on the lead.

She sits back down with a bigger grin than she went up with, and feeds Toffee a treat as Zoe calls up Thor.

“Is there any way we could keep his lead on or something?” Phil asks Zoe quietly when he’s stood beside her, and Zoe smiles at him.

“This is important for his growth and development. Helps his independence but also lets him know that you’re always in charge.”

When Phil bites his lip, Zoe smiles again. “You’ll be fine, Phil, just try your best.”

And so Phil walks to the back wall and reluctantly stretches out his arms.

“Thor, come.”

Thor is still jumping up Zoe’s legs trying to get to the treats she’s holding, and she stands up and gently pushes Thor in Phil’s direction and gestures for him to call his puppy again.

“Thor, come.”

This time, Thor snaps his head towards Phil and his tongue lolls out of his mouth, and he begins running across the room.

Phil’s smile grows as he watches Thor run towards him, but his heart sinks as Thor all of a sudden veers off and runs towards Toffee and pounces on her, wanting to play. This then triggers Bayley to bark from beside Toffee, and Zoe struggles to regain control of the situation.

Phil continues to call Thor but to no avail, as the Labrador begins to run in circles around the room, clearly loving every single second, and manages to slip out of everyone’s grasp that attempts to grab hold of him.

When Dan stands up from the table he was sitting behind and calmly walks over to where Thor is running in circles, Phil notices Dodie leaning forward in her chair, looking between both men with clear intrigue. Phil shakes his head at her, and Dodie shrugs in response.

Dan kneels down on the floor and holds up a treat, and it’s almost robotic, the way that Thor comes bounding over and flops down onto the floor, looking up at Dan’s hand with big, wide eyes.

“How do you do that?” one of Bayley’s owners asks, and Dan turns to him.

“I’ve been at this for a long time,” he replies.

“But this dog is a lost cause except when it’s with you,” Skye’s owner chimes in, and Phil looks down at the floor.

“ _He’s_ not a lost cause, no dog is.” Dan strokes Thor’s head as he makes quick work of the treat. “As Zoe and I have said, we’re all here to get better at training our dogs, none is better than any other.”

Skye’s owner sits back in her seat with a pout, and Dodie crosses her legs and sits back too. When Phil looks towards her, she has a raised eyebrow.

When Thor has his lead back on (which Dan does, out of Phil’s fear that nobody could catch him if Dan let him go again), Zoe calls all of the dogs up for a controlled walk with a communal meeting in the middle, during which time Dan takes Phil off to the side of the room.

“So, I think a big problem we have here is that he has so much energy that he’s just not burning off,” Dan explains. “Have you ever thought of, like, hiring a field out for a while? Just so he can run around and tire himself out a bit?”

“I can’t say I have ever thought of hiring a field, no,” Phil replies and Dan smiles.

“It’s just an idea. Think about it, I think it could help his pulling on the lead and his constant overexcitement.”

“I will. Thanks, Dan.”

Dan places a hand on Phil’s arm. “You’ll get there, Phil, really.”

“You’re the expert, I’ll trust you.”

Dan laughs. “I can’t help but feel like we’ve been here before.”

“You mean when you decided to troll me?”

“That’s exactly what I mean,” Dan grins. “We should do it again sometime.”

“Do you always troll your students’ owners?”

Dan shrugs and nods towards the others. “Go and join in and we’ll talk later.”

And so Phil does join in the circle with the other dogs and owners, and Dodie immediately picks up her pace to be able to walk beside him.

“Nice chat?” she teases.

“I’m leaving now,” Phil speeds up, but Dodie matches his pace.

“Denial means yes!”

Phil simply shakes his head and suppresses a laugh as he guides Thor into meeting the other dogs in the middle.


	6. Six

“You literally hired a field,” Martyn says as he walks over to stand beside his brother. “A literal fucking field.”

Both men look out across the huge field in front of them, and watch Cornelia walking Thor along one of the edges.

“Mum and dad did,” Phil replies, “I just told them Dan suggested it, I didn’t ask them to.”

“I’m pretty sure they’ve done more for your dog than they did for us when we were kids.” Martyn laughs and nudges Phil’s arm, and Phil rolls his eyes.

“You were just the least favourite kid, so speak for yourself.”

They lightly shove each other which leads to an impromptu game of tag, and running around the field just like they did when they were kids. Thor slips out of Cornelia’s grasp and runs after them, which then turns into a five minute sprint to catch him.

Out of breath and red faced, at some point Phil falls over, and effectively faceplants the ground. He can distantly hear Martyn’s hysterical roaring laughter, Cornelia’s scolding as a result of it, and Thor’s excited barks.

His whole body feels as if it’s throbbing and shutting down on him, wanting him to stay sprawled out on the grass. When a hand comes into his peripheral vision, offering to help him up, it’s like a godsend.

“I’m going to kill you one of these days,” Phil mumbles as he gets to his feet, fully ready to push his brother over to live the same embarrassment.

Except it’s not Martyn, it’s Dan, holding a patient Thor’s lead in his other hand.

“At least take me out to dinner first,” Dan jokes.

Phil catches sight of Martyn and Cornelia leaning against the fence at the end of the field, both of them looking over with clear interest and surprise. Martyn holds up a hand heart, and Phil flips him off. Martyn manages to drop his hands at the exact second Dan turns around to look at him, and instead smiles and waves.

“Your brother’s really nice, by the way.”

“Jury’s still out on that one,” Phil replies, brushing off some dirt from his clothes. “But without sounding rude, why are you here?”

“Your parents emailed me and told me they’d hired this field out for you like I suggested, didn’t they tell you?” Dan bites his lip and shuffles on his feet.

“No, they didn’t mention that.” Phil looks down at the floor.

Thankfully, Thor breaks the awkwardness and barks, and jumps up Dan’s legs.

“So I think we should let Thor off the lead and just run around,” Dan says, the previous awkwardness in his tone and face completely gone now. Phil notices he’s looking around the field and not at him, though. “Let off some energy, we’ll see if it makes a difference.”

“Yeah, okay,” Phil takes Thor’s lead which Dan hands over to him, and unclips it from his collar. “I trust you.”

Dan simply nods, and they both stand and watch Thor run around so quickly he almost seems a blur, covering every inch of the field in what seems like mere seconds.

“You could’ve texted me, you know.” Phil has to bring it up.

“I assumed you knew,” Dan replies, “Why would I think your parents wouldn’t tell you?”

“Okay, I’ll forgive you for intruding on my family time on one condition.”

“Intruding?” Dan repeats, turning to Phil.

“Intruding.” Phil swallows and places a hand on Dan’s shoulder. He notices Dan swallow too.

“What’s the condition?”

“You’ll have to catch me first.”

Phil pats Dan’s shoulder and immediately takes off in the opposite direction. The first few seconds are tense as he wonders if Dan will even play along or if he’s just mortified himself, but as soon as he hears Dan’s footsteps gaining on him, pounding on the grass, he smiles and speeds up.

As he passes Martyn and Cornelia, he sees Cornelia’s wide eyes and Martyn’s smirk, and he flips his brother off again before changing directions to send Dan off course.

Thor decides to join in soon after and begins chasing after the two, but as the fastest, he easily catches up and runs in front of Phil and barks excitedly, but Phil notices at just the wrong time and trips over, and the breath is crushed out of him like a helium balloon as Dan falls on top of him a second later, and Phil already hears Martyn’s hysterical laughter, which attracts Thor’s attention and the Labrador goes bounding over to him and Cornelia, thankfully unscathed from Phil’s trip.

“Are you okay?” Cornelia calls over, and Phil lifts a weary thumbs up, which only causes Martyn to laugh louder.

“I was still out of breath from last time but I genuinely think I might be dead now.” Phil mumbles.

“Don’t be such a drama queen,” Dan replies, evidently just as breathless. “This was your idea to begin with.”

“It was your choice to join me,” Phil says lightheartedly, and lightly kicks Dan, and the brunet laughs.

“Yeah because I was really going to turn down a cute guy asking me to play tag.”

The tension builds the second the word leaves Dan’s mouth and climaxes when he stops speaking. Heat rushes through Phil’s body and settles on his already red face, and he feels Dan shift awkwardly on top of him.

Dan scrambles to climb off of him, during which time Phil is just frozen where he is, staring at a single blade of grass, not knowing what to say or do, so he chooses to do nothing. However Dan steps on a particularly muddy part of the field and slips once more, this time on his back beside Phil, and Martyn’s laughter which had begun to subside starts up again.

Dan coughs and gets to his feet, and Phil gets to his feet too, and sets off walking towards Martyn and Cornelia, Thor is having a rare moment of calm whilst laying down beside them.

“Having fun?” Martyn teases and wiggles his eyebrows, and Phil simply glares at him and carefully clips Thor’s lead back onto his collar. He pretends to be busying himself with the lead whilst Dan walks over and mumbles a goodbye before leaving.

“Trouble in paradise already,” Martyn whispers (loudly) to Cornelia, and she gently hits his arm before coming over to place her hand on Phil’s shoulder.

“Ready to go or do you want to stay a bit longer?”

“I think he’s ready for a nap, so we’ll go,” Phil replies, still looking at the ground.

Cornelia nods and they all walk over to the car and drive back to Phil and Martyn’s parents’ house. Phil doesn’t say a word the whole way there, just sits in silence, stroking Thor’s head.

Once Thor is settled and asleep in the living room, Phil brushes off his parents’ many questions and goes to his childhood room and collapses on the bed, and overthinks everything until he falls into a turbulent sleep.


	7. Seven

“You’re _such_ a fucking faker.” Martyn strolls into the room and pulls open the curtains, and Phil pulls the covers over his head to hide from the sunlight.

“Then please enlighten me what I’m faking.”

“What, like a list?”

“If you want to be a dick about it.”

Martyn laughs and sits on the edge of the bed. “You’re faking being ill so you don’t have to go to puppy training because you’re trying to convince yourself you don’t have feelings for the puppy trainer.”

Phil slowly drops the duvet from over his head, and is met by the sight of his grinning brother, in between popping the grapes in his mouth that their parents brought up for him just before leaving to take Thor to training.

“It worked, didn’t it?”

Martyn throws a grape at him. “Only because you learned from the best when we were growing up.”

“The only thing you were good for when we were growing up.” Phil throws the grape back at him and his brother catches it in his mouth.

“I kept your secret of kissing those posters every night,” Martyn nods over towards the posters on one of the walls, of various men and women Phil had torn out of magazines and stuck up throughout his childhood. “Especially the emo guy, remember that? You kissed that one so much you tore through it and were so scared mum and dad would find out you ripped it up and stuffed it in the bin to hide the evidence.”

“Leave.”

Martyn laughs again. “Come to think of it, Dan kind of looks like that emo guy, doesn’t he?”

“Dan’s not an emo.” Phil internally cringes at how automatic his response was.

Martyn grins, clearly having picked up on it too. “Okay.”

“ _Leave.”_

Picking up Phil’s now cold bowl of soup, Martyn exits with the promise of returning soon. Phil threatens to punch him if he does. Martyn laughs.

Just as he’s about to shout more profanities at his brother, his phone pings from the bedside table.

 

_Dodie: okay i’m just a little bit in love with your parents_

_Dodie: they’re so nice_

_Dodie: but it’s awfully convenient both you and dan aren’t here_

_Dodie: have fun xxxx_

Phil squints at his phone and rubs at his eyes. Dan isn’t at training either, he definitely just read that right. Dan could be ill, he reasons with himself, but his gut instinct is telling him it’s not the case. Not that he has a solid theory otherwise.

 

_Phil: is Thor behaving_

_Dodie: define behaving_

_Dodie: but I’d say no_

_Dodie: he’s already pulled away from your dad three times_

_Phil: kind of glad I’m not there_

_Dodie: toffee is like all over him though she loves him today_

_Phil: my dog has a better love life than me_

_Dodie: interesting you’d bring that up_

_Phil: I’m leaving now_

_Dodie: ;)_

He places his phone back down and pulls the covers back over his head and wills himself to sleep once more.

It fails and he’s up in an hour.

Martyn and Cornelia are enjoying bowls of cereal in front of the tv, and both turn to greet him.

“Look who’s finally up!” Cornelia smiles.

“You look so much better, almost like you were never ill,” Martyn says casually, and laughs when Phil flips him off and walks over to flop in the armchair beside the sofa.

“You feeling okay now?” Cornelia asks, and Martyn rolls his eyes.

“He was never ill in the first place!” he turns to Phil with a smirk. “Unless we’re counting _lovesickness.”_

Phil flips him off again and Cornelia lightly swats Martyn’s arm.

“Leave him alone, it’s cute!”

“What’s cute?” Phil asks, settling deeper into the armchair, partly out of nerves he daren’t contemplate the cause of.

“You and Dan,” she says innocently, eyes wide as if she doesn’t understand why she had to explain. Martyn coughs to disguise his laugh.

“I barely know the guy.”

“Could’ve fooled me,” Cornelia’s eyes are even wider. “Given how you were on the field.”

“And the fact he has the raging hots for you,” Martyn adds with a finger gun, and Phil rolls his eyes and gets to his feet.

“Corn, I love you and I’m extremely glad you’re in my life and appreciate you caring but there’s nothing there,” Phil turns to Martyn. “And you can just go fuck yourself.”

Martyn smirks. “Touchy when we talk about a certain guy, are we?”

Phil huffs and walks back up to his room, and turns on his old Xbox to distract himself until his parents and Thor get back and his façade continues.

That was his plan, anyway, until his phone buzzed again.

_Dan: i’ve got something to tell you_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so sorry it's been so long!! 
> 
> i started work a couple of weeks ago so i've been settling in ever since, and every night when i get home i've just been exhausted and pretty much passed out before 9pm so i've not had time to write, but now i'm getting to grips with the schedule and hopefully updates should be more regular :)
> 
> also sorry this chapter is quite short, i'm just getting back into the swing of things!


	8. Eight

Three texts later, no response. Firstly, he tries sounding breezy. Secondly, breeziness is a distant memory as he assumes it’s about puppy training and worries Thor won’t be able to go back for whatever reason, thirdly he just tries practically begging for a response.

For most of the day, he doesn’t even see his puppy, Thor is downstairs with the rest of the family, lapping up the attention, whereas Phil is isolating himself with his phone.

“Are you planning to see the light of day today?” Martyn doesn’t bother knocking, and just walks into the room.

“Are you planning to ever go home?” Phil retorts, not taking his eyes off his phone screen, which hasn’t lit up in hours.

“You’re so pathetic,” Martyn laughs, “You weren’t smooth as a teenager but at least you could contain yourself when someone didn’t text you back after an hour.”

“It’s been four hours, actually,” Phil replies, immediately closing his eyes in regret and sighing.

“Point proven,” Martyn sings, and closes the door behind him just before the pillow Phil throws at him would hit.

The longer he sits in silence the longer he realises his brother’s right. _Of course_ he’s right.

\--

_Dan: sorry i had some stuff to sort out_

It’s not the kind of text Phil was expecting, especially not at three in the morning, but it’s welcome all the same.

_Phil: everything okay?_

_Dan: why are you awake lmao_

_Phil: why are you?_

_Dan: touche_

_Dan: but i had stuff to sort out i told you_

_Phil: but you didn’t tell me what you had to tell me_

_Dan: oh yeah_

_Dan: that_

_Dan: nvm_

 

Phil finds himself holding his breath.

_Phil: tell me anyway_

_Dan: what_

_Phil: i can be incredibly stubborn_

He can’t. He’s terrible at being stubborn, he always gives in too easily.

 

_Dan: did you know 90% of sea otters live on the coast of alaska_

 

Phil squints at his phone in the darkness.

 

_Phil: did you know there are 13 species of otter_

_Dan: i don’t think anyone knows that_

_Phil: i know that_

_Dan: i know it means you’re probably an otter_

_Phil: however did you guess_

_Dan: knew there was something special about you_

At this, Phil rolls over and smiles into his pillow. He hates it, but _fuck_ does he love it at the same time.

 

_Phil: will you tell me what you wanted to tell me earlier_

_Dan: i forgot_

_Dan: sorry_

_Dan: see you in training though?_

_Phil: i think my mum might be going in my place_

It’s a lie. But he has an inherent need in that moment to just test the waters a little.

 

_Dan: oh?_

_Phil: yeah idk_

_Dan: do you have work?_

_Phil: i might be doing overtime_

_Dan: works out for me, i want to see if there’s this book i’ve wanted for a while_

_Dan: can’t believe you’re leaving me alone tho_

_Phil: it’s literally your job_

_Dan: still won’t be the same_

_Dan: i’ll give thor a message to give to you_

_Phil: i’ll look forward to it_

And finally, he falls asleep.

Only to be woken up four hours later by his puppy excitedly barking from downstairs. It seems to set the pace for the day, as Phil’s luck is defined by his manager calling to inform him that his colleague has called in sick and so has the substitute, so there’s nobody to cover the last shift – the shift that will run through the training class.

His mum is all too willing to take Thor to training in his stead, and Thor also seems happy about the situation. Martyn continues to mock him and Phil continues to flip him off, but Phil isn’t prepared for Martyn offering to join Kath for the training class.

“No.” Phil points at his brother and wiggles his finger. “I mean it.”

Kath rolls her eyes and places a hand on her hip. “Phil, if he wants to go then he can go, Thor will love it.”

“Besides it’s not like you’ll be here to stop me,” Martyn grins.

He walks over to Phil and drapes an arm around his shoulders. “I’m going to bond with your puppy trainer, isn’t that what you want?”

“I don’t know anything I want less,” Phil replies monotonously and Martyn laughs.

“I can think of something.”

“Which is?”

Martyn grins and begins walking to fetch Thor’s lead for his morning walk.

“You’ll find out.”


	9. Nine.

“What do you _mean_ you don’t have the new Daphne Du Maurier novel?” the old man Phil has been dealing with for the past ten minutes leans on his walking cane. “I thought this was a library?”

Phil bites his lip for a second and begins tapping his fingers quietly on the counter, a way of trying to not get himself worked up.

“Sir, I’m sorry but as I have tried to tell you before-“

“I don’t want your excuses, boy.” The man sighs and turns to leave. “I remember when libraries used to actually stock books.”

His exit leaves Phil temporarily depleted of energy, and he flops into the chair behind the counter and runs a hand through his hair.

“Harsh.”

At the voice, Phil spins on the chair and is met with a sympathetically smiling Dan, who gently closes the book he was reading and rests it on his lap. He’s sat in a section close to the main counter, and Phil wonders just how long he’s been there.

Phil shrugs, and Dan picks up the book and walks over to Phil’s counter, and rests his arms on the countertop.

“I know I’m not as book savvy as you, but didn’t Daphne Du Maurier-“

“Nineteen eighty nine, yes. And that man has already checked out her last novel about four times.”

At this, Dan laughs and it does lift Phil’s spirits slightly.

“It’s all worth it for that big librarian paycheck at the end of the month though, right?”

“Oh yeah, can’t you tell I’m absolutely loaded?”

“About as loaded as a full-time puppy trainer, I’d imagine.”

They both share a smile and Phil groans. “It just feels like this shift is never going to end.”

“Well, I’ve got nowhere to go. I can always wait it out with you if you want.”

“Nowhere to go?” Phil asks. “No hot date, no adorable stray to bring home and train, no old flame to reconnect with and reignite?”

Dan rolls his eyes. “Fuck no, I fucking wish, and fucking gross.”

“You swear a lot.”

“And you don’t swear anywhere near enough,” Dan shrugs, “Society would have a hard time deciding who is more pathetic.”

“If you’re just going to undermine me then I don’t know if I want you here,” Phil teases, and turns away to put away some of the returned books from earlier in the day.

“I’ll be a good boy, promise.” Dan replies, and when Phil turns back around, Dan is saluting.

“You really don’t have to be here, though,” Phil assures him, “Like, I appreciate it, but it’s not the most exciting thing in the world.”

“And going back to leftover Chinese and a rerun of Family Guy is?”

Phil raises an eyebrow. “That’s oddly specific.”

“That’s only what I’d be doing otherwise.”

“Duly noted, you can stay with me in the ever exciting library.”

Dan bows. “You’re too kind, sir.”

“You’re too weird, sir.” Phil’s retort causes Dan to smirk and lean further on the counter.

“So, anything I can do to help?”

“You’re sure?”

Dan nods. “Hit me with the glorious tasks of a librarian.”

Phil picks up the remainder of the books he has to put away. “Well, it’s pretty much only these, I’ve done everything else, it’s been a slow shift.”

Dan reaches over to scoop about half of the books from the pile. “On it.”

Phil watches Dan for a minute or two as he walks around the library slotting in the books, and he doesn’t realise he’s smiling until Dan meets his gaze and smiles and mouths _why are you smiling._ So he doesn’t have to respond, Phil pretends not to have understood and sets off putting back his own books.

They make up a game quite quickly which they dub the ‘one word sentence game’, where they take it in turns to read a random sentence from the book they’re currently holding and try to make a narrative out of them. It makes no sense, it’s a competitor for one of the stupidest pastimes Phil’s ever taken part in, but by far one of the most fun. By the end of the task when there are no books left to be put away, they’re both wheezing for breath, and collapse on adjoining chairs for the comedown of the hysteria.

“My stomach hurts so much,” Phil says through his laughter, hands pressed into his stomach for emphasis.

“Same,” Dan replies, and turns to face him. “But when I was little and me and my brother couldn’t stop laughing, my grandma always told us to have a staring contest to calm down.”

“That works?”

Dan shrugs. “Fucked if I remember. Worth a try though, right?”

Phil nods. “I think if I laugh any more I’m going to explode and they’ll be cleaning Phil goo off the walls for a month.”

“Grossly vivid there,” Dan says, then twists his body so he’s fully facing Phil and places his hands on his lap.

Phil follows suit, and he takes a second to wipe at his eyes before he nods.

Dan counts them down from three and the staring contest begins, and though he might be kidding himself, Phil is sure he can see the hysteria drain from Dan’s eyes, and notices at the same time that his breathing has steadied, if not slowed slightly, and it’s only when Dan’s gaze darts to the side for a moment that Phil realises he’s been holding his own breath.

And even though he _knows_ he’s kidding himself now, he’s sure that at some point they’d gravitated closer, and he has a feeling it’d be tougher leaning back than it would leaning forwards anymore.

His gaze remains locked on Dan’s eyes, and vice versa, and by this point he’s acutely aware of Dan’s breathing, and how it remains steady for the most part, but sometimes comes out hitched, he wonders if his is doing the same.

“Excuse me?”

The voice causes them both to jump, and Phil nearly falls sideways off of the chair he’s sitting on, and a girl who looks in her early teenage years smiles at them from the other side of the counter, a small pile of books in front of her.

“Of course, sorry!” Phil scrambles to stand up and almost run over to her, and serves her almost in record time.

She thanks him and leaves, but Phil just can’t bring himself to turn around. He doesn’t know why. He pretends to busy himself with tidying the counter top even though it’s already immaculate (for his standards, anyway), and then pretends to restack the spare library cards on one of the shelves below the counter.

“So I think I’m going to go, I forgot I had something to do tonight.” When Phil stands back up, Dan is clutching his phone in one of his hands and is obviously avoiding Phil’s gaze. “Will you be okay on your own?”

Though he tries his best to push it away, Phil feels the distinct paranoia and worry flood into his mind. “Sure, thank you for helping out.”

Dan simply nods. “Alright, bye. Give Thor a belly rub for me, he did good today.”

And then Dan leaves, without another word or another look back, and Phil sits on his chair and rests his head against the headrest, looking up at the ceiling.

No other customers come until the library closes, and he feels almost in a daze as he goes through the routine of locking up, travelling and arriving home, and slipping into bed.

It’s weird having an otherwise empty home since Thor is spending one more night with his parents to be dropped off in the morning, and the absence of Thor’s soft snores just means Phil’s left with his own thoughts.

It’s little shock to him that he only manages an hour and half of sleep.


	10. Ten.

“So I’ll be flying solo today!” Zoe announces, and hugs her clipboard to her chest. “But I won’t be going easy on you, we’re having a kind of mid-way evaluation to see if you’ve all been practising your training out of classes.”

Immediately, Bailey’s owners jump to their feet and grin at each other, and Phil can’t help but smile along with them, they look like a family already, two parents and their little puppy, along with the little bump that they both have a hand on. It’s the kind of future Phil thought he’d be having himself way back when.

Skye’s owners get to their feet too and begin walking to the corner of the room, making sure to cast disapproving glances towards Phil and Thor as they go. Thor is already pulling on his lead and panting heavily, and Phil simply lets Thor pull him to where he wants to go, thankfully the corner furthest away from Skye and her owners.

Dodie and Toffee make their way to an empty space and Toffee immediately sits at Dodie’s feet and looks up at her, awaiting the next command. Dodie smiles over at Phil and he smiles back, but it quickly fizzles out when Thor continues to ignore Phil’s commands.

“I’ll give you all about ten minutes to prepare then we’ll go one at a time!” Zoe smiles and goes and sits back behind the table, and scribbles something down on her clipboard.

“Thor, please just give me this,” Phil pleads with his puppy, as if guilt trips would in any way work. “I think we’re already hated enough here.”

Thor stops pulling for a moment and cocks his head to the side, almost as if he’s considering it, but then proceeds to once more pull towards the other dogs, the closest being Bailey.

Bailey, of course, ignores him and continues to listen to his owners, and at a quick glance around the room, as is every other dog.

Every time Phil looks over, Zoe seems to be looking back, and proceeds to write something else down. He then looks around the room once more, and sees every other puppy seemingly angelic, obeying every command and awaiting the next.

He wonders if he looks as defeated as he feels.

“He really falls apart without Dan here,” Dodie says quietly as they all take their seats again.

“I’m sure that’s exactly what it is.”

Dodie smirks and sits back, and turns her attention to Skye, who is the first to undergo the mid-way test.

\--

_Dodie: seriously though do you know why he wasn’t there today_

_Phil: no clue_

_Dodie: bet you could find out_

_Phil: why are you so invested_

_Dodie: i want my friends to be happy is that a crime_

_Phil: you just want gossip_

_Dodie: i just want to be cupid_

_Phil: then point those arrows somewhere else_

_Dodie: do you realise half of the time you speak like you’re out of a poem or shitty novel_

_Phil: so now I have something else to be paranoid about thank you_

_Dodie: it’s endearing!_

_Phil: bet I couldn’t find anyone who agrees_

_Dodie: not if you don’t text him you won’t_

_Phil: and that’s my cue to leave_

_Dodie: until next time xxxx_

_Phil: ugh_

_Dodie: also please don’t overthink what happened today, it’s really okay_

_Dodie: could’ve happened to anyone_

Phil lets his phone fall to the floor and drops his head into his pillow. Thor is snuggled at his feet, stretched across the length of the bed.

He hasn’t heard from Dan since their stint at the library, and there’s a pang in his gut that has caused paranoia to bloom.

Of course he could be the one to text, but he’s never been well rehearsed in the realm of texting etiquette, and figures Dan would rather be left alone to work through whatever has caused him not to turn up to his job.

When he inevitably falls asleep, he flashes back in his own life, almost in a state of lucid dreaming as he hovers over his past self, the university years. It’s something he’s been able to do since he was a child, he can’t choose what he relives, but whatever his brain subconsciously chooses, he can see in vivid detail as if it was happening for the first time.

Of course he’s never told anyone, but since he googled it one time and found out he’s not the only one, in fact there’s countless forums discussing it and some questionable tumblr blogs about it, he’s not really overthought it that much and just accepts it for what it is.

He watches as he gets a pep talk from friends, and then makes his way over to the girl he was completely enamoured with at the time.

He remembers his heart being in his throat as he approaches her, and her wide smile that greets him immediately put him at ease. It was funny, really, almost like a movie moment.

His friends were in an inconspicuous huddle at the other end of the courtyard, trying their hardest to disguise the fact they were obviously watching.

He wishes he could get closer, listen to exactly what was being said, since it’s all a blur when he looks back on it now. He watches intently as he makes all the conversation, and she barely returns it, just sticks to little nods and the occasional lip twitch. He didn’t notice at the time, could barely focus on anything but his heart pounding in his ears.

When he eventually walks away it’s after a shake of her head and a hand on his shoulder, and his friends barely say a word when he walks back over, just hang their heads and a couple pat his back.

That part he remembers in vivid detail.

And in what seems like the blink of an eye he’s back to just a few days ago, in the library, with Dan. When the conversation flows like a river downstream, and the smile never leaves his face, remains until the muscles ache.

When he thinks back, he realises it’s the same intense heartbeat, the same anticipation in his gut.

And it’s then that he wakes up in a cold sweat, breathing as heavy as Thor’s typically is.

In the pitch darkness, Phil hears Thor shuffle, and can make out his puppy’s eyes blinking sleepily at him, clearly having woken up at the same time Phil did. Almost as if he’s sensing something’s wrong, Thor shuffles across the bed and sprawls across Phil’s chest, and settles back down.  

Phil continues to stroke Thor until the Labrador falls asleep again, and afterwards just stares at nothing. Frankly, he’s thankful for the distraction his puppy provides, thankful to be able to focus on anything except the feeling of something long since felt creeping up on him.


	11. Eleven.

“I knew it was him!” Phil shouted out, even pointing at his laptop at the same time.

His day off has been spent binge watching true crime videos, in between letting Thor out to do his business, but even then he was constantly looking over his shoulder.

“We’re officially never leaving the house again, Thor.” Phil looks over to his puppy, who is laying at the other end of the sofa, happily eating a chew. Thor pauses for a moment and blinks at Phil, then goes back to his chew.

He considers it an agreement and clicks onto the next video.

 

_Dodie: so are you ready for the final exam_

_Phil: remind me when_

_Dodie: idk like two weeks right_

_Phil: lol no_

_Dodie: i think toffee’s gonna smash it_

_Dodie: thor too ofc_

_Phil: i think he might be a lost cause like me_

_Dodie: you’re only a lost cause because u pussyfoot around your feelings_

_Phil: I’ve always been good at that_

_Dodie: deep_

Phil smiles and puts down his phone and settles in for the next video, pulling his blanket up to his chin and letting his foot rest against Thor’s fur for a sense of comfort as he begins learning about yet another serial killer.

An annoying amount of his neighbours decide to come and go in the space of half an hour, and every time a door closes he lets himself believe a serial killer has been welcomed into his building. It’s always the neighbours they go for next, so they can’t talk about what they saw or heard.

“If someone busts in here, promise me you’ll run and tell mum and dad,” Phil says to Thor, and the puppy doesn’t even acknowledge him, now too invested in his chew. “Not Martyn, though, he’ll find a way to take the piss.”

At this, Thor casts a sideways glance at him.

“Fine, you can tell Martyn too, as long as he brings Cornelia.”

Thor returns to his chew.

Sometime during the hour long Grindr Killer video, he manages to drift off after getting no sleep the past night, and is woken up by a soft knock on the front door.

Even in a sleepy haze, he bolts upright, Thor too, only his puppy recovers long before he does, and Thor jumps down off the sofa and sprints towards the door, barking loudly, tail wagging quickly.

Phil refuses to move. If the murderer thinks Thor is home alone, they’ll leave. He does sound like a Rottweiler when he’s full-bark, after all.

After a minute or so, Thor deems the coast is clear and trots back and jumps back on the sofa, snuggling against Phil’s legs.

“Good boy,” Phil praises, stroking Thor’s head slowly, “Protecting the house. What an alpha male should be.”

Thor snuggles closer.

Then there’s another knock, and again Thor goes insane.

 

_Dan: for the love of god let me in_

_Dan: also when are you bringing your new dog to my classes i can give you a discount_

And then Phil finds himself jumping up and dashing over to the door with staggering speed, moving on still half-asleep legs.

He opens the door a crack, making sure to place a leg in front of Thor so he can’t escape.

“Were you followed?”

Dan blinks at him.

“Were you expecting me to be followed?”

“I hope for my life’s sake you’re not.”

Dan raises an eyebrow. “Have you taken something?”

“I’m never leaving my house ever again and you need to accept my life choices.”

Dan places a hand over his heart, feigning offence. “Are my classes that bad? Do I need to book Zoe on a training course?”

“Her customer service is impeccable.”

“So explain to me again why you’re not leaving your house and why I apparently can’t enter.”

“You could be tailed by a serial killer.”

Dan places a hand on his hip. “Well, everyone does want a piece of me, so…”

Phil rolls his eyes and opens his door enough for Dan to slip inside.

Thor immediately jumps up Dan’s legs, evidently ecstatic to be in his presence again. Dan seems to show just as much enthusiasm as he fusses over the Labrador, and crouches to accept all of the sloppy kisses Thor delivers to his face.

It then dawns on Phil that _Dan_ is his guest. _Dan_ is in house.

_Dan_ that he had a dream-epiphany about.

“Funny, he’s really not that loving to people that come to my house.” Phil instantly regrets saying it, despite it being the truth.

“You get a lot of guests?”

“Not ones that stay after they get what they come for.” Again, he regrets it.

Regrets it even more when Dan presses his lips together and darts his gaze downwards and busies himself with Thor, who is still excitedly pawing at his legs.

When Dan looks back up, he glances towards Phil’s setup, where his laptop is plugged into the TV, paused in the middle of a video.

“Did I come at a bad time?” Dan asks, and Phil shakes his head, unsure there would even be a bad time.

“We were just watching true crime videos.”

“We?” Dan questions, and Phil nods towards Thor.

“He prefers the solved ones.”

“I’m a little concerned that he has a preference at all.”

Phil smiles, and steps forward to gently push Thor down and leave Dan alone.

“Is there room for one more? I could do with another reason to be horrified and terrified of humanity.”

“Sure.”

They both walk over to the sofa, Thor happily trotting as close to Dan as humanly possible, and he immediately jumps up and sprawls over Dan’s lap. Phil goes to tell him to get down, but Dan holds up a hand and hugs Thor instead, and they both settle down.

“Prepare to never want to leave this room ever again.”

“Born ready.”

Phil smiles and restarts the Grindr Killer video, he wants to see the end of it anyway.

\--

“Okay so that’s dating apps, hotels, cruise ships, aeroplanes, relative’s houses, bars and shops I’m never going near ever again, am I missing any?” Dan says, turning to Phil as their twentieth video draws to a close.

“No kids.”

Dan laughs. “Barely needed any convincing to never want any of those.”

His gaze drops to Thor, who is now snoring lightly on the floor, across Dan and Phil’s feet.

“Fur babies are enough for me.”

“I’m sure there are some true crime about pets-“

Dan holds up a hand. “You fucking _dare.”_

Phil bursts into laughter, and a few seconds later Dan joins in.

When the laughter dies down, Phil turns to him. “I’m a terrible host, I didn’t even ask what you came for in the first place.”

He notices Dan freeze in place and his body stiffen, and how his gaze falls to his hands.

“I’m too caught up in being terrified to even remember,” he eventually says, and meets Phil’s gaze again. “But it’s late, I should go.”

“You’re really going to trust public transport? After the last video?”

“Fuck no.”

“Uber’s even worse!”

“No.”

“You’re surely not walking home?”

“Zoe.”

Phil nods in understanding. “The safest option by far.”

“I think so too.”

“So she’s just… waiting for you?”

“She’s staying with her boyfriend, he doesn’t live far.”

Phil nods, and Dan gets to his feet. Luckily for him, Thor is in too deep of a sleep to get up and follow.

After a simple exchange of goodbye and lame waves, Phil finds himself alone (with Thor) once more, and as he sits back down, sinking into the cushions, he rubs his hands over his face when that same thought enters his mind and won’t leave.


	12. Twelve.

“So, let me get this straight,” Dodie puts down her mug and laces her fingers together, and rests her hands on the table. “He just came to your house for literally no reason and stayed for what, like five hours?”

“He said he forgot the reason he came.”

Dodie laughs so hard she snorts, and covers her mouth with wide eyes for a moment, dropping it when she realises Phil isn’t going to call her out on it. “I didn’t think one man could be so oblivious until I met you.”

“I’m not oblivious when there’s nothing to see.”

Dodie rolls her eyes and picks her mug back up.  “It’s getting to the point where I’m seriously considering just locking the two of you in a room.”

“Pretty sure that’s some kind of illegal.”

Dodie smirks. “That’s what makes it fun.”

Phil doesn’t respond, just takes a sip of his coffee.

“So he didn’t spend the night?”

Phil shakes his head, and Dodie takes another sip.

“How did he get home?”

“Zoe picked him up.”

Dodie raises an eyebrow. “Zoe was just on standby to pick him up at two in the morning?”

Phil shrugs. “So he said.”

He can hear his heart pounding in his ears when Dodie leans back in her seat and gives him a knowing smile.

“What?”

The smile doesn’t drop. “Nothing, we should go.”

And with that, Dodie drains the rest of her drink and gets up to leave, and a confused Phil scrambles after her.

“What were you smiling at me like that for?” Phil asks, and Dodie slings an arm around his shoulders.

“Go pick up Thor and i’ll meet you at training, yeah?”

Before Phil has a chance to respond, Dodie is walking off in the general direction of her flat, and she doesn’t turn back to give him a chance to show his confused stare.

\--

“So today we’ll be going around to each of you to see how your dogs are progressing, in the meantime find a space in the room and get practising!” Zoe addresses the room as enthusiastically as usual, and everyone finds different spaces in the room. Dodie and Toffee settle on a space not too far from Phil and Thor. Thankfully, Skye and her owners are on the complete opposite side of the room, but it still doesn’t stop them from throwing sour glances his way whenever Thor barks a little too loudly.

Dan and Zoe start with Bailey and his owners, and when Dan catches Phil looking, he smiles warmly, and Phil returns it.

“Can you stop eye-fucking in front of the dogs?” Dodie says as she skips over, Toffee at her heels.

When Phil gives her a wide-eyed panicked stare, she bursts into laughter, which in turn earns her a sour glance of her very own from Skye’s owners.

“I’m just fucking with you, come on.” she nudges Phil’s arm and leans in close. “That reaction said it all though!” She winks and walks back over to where she was previously.

Phil looks down at his puppy, and Thor is staring right back up at him, and he cocks his head to the side, his tongue lolling out of his mouth.

“I don’t know either,” he runs a hand through his hair and makes himself focus. “Right, sit.”

Thor does, but a second later bounces back to his feet and jumps up Phil’s legs.

“Come on Thor, no,” Phil gently pushes him back down. “Sit.”

Instead, Thor runs in a circle then looks back up at him, tail wagging wildly.

Phil pulls a treat out of his pocket to try and entice his puppy into listening, but each time Thor just jumps up his legs again.

“Someone’s excited today!” Zoe says as she and Dan approach them, clipboards in hand.

“A bundle of energy as always,” Phil jokes, and nervously laughs.

“I’m sure,” Zoe smiles, “So why don’t you show us what you’ve been working on?”

Phil nods and looks down at Thor, who is darting his gaze between the three adults.

“Thor,” At his name, Thor snaps his head towards Phil. “Sit.”

He holds his index finger out as he had been taught, and for a second, Thor bends his legs as if preparing to sit, then instead launches himself at Phil’s legs and tries to playfully nibble on his finger.

Zoe writes something down on her clipboard, and Dan is smiling sympathetically.

“Thor, sit.” He tries again, but the same thing happens.

“How about another?” Dan asks, nodding not-so-subtly to his clipboard, and tilting it slightly so Phil can catch a glance of the scoring sheet both he and Zoe are supposed to be filling in.

So Phil tries various other commands that he has been taught throughout the sessions, and Thor successfully gets through a grand total of none of them.

“To be fair, it’s obvious he does know the commands,” Dan says, turning to his colleague, “He does react to each one.”

“Definitely,” Zoe replies, and jots something down.

“Out of curiosity, what happens if he fails?”

“He can’t fail, Phil, don’t worry,” Zoe smiles, “It’s not fair to grade on passes and fails, everyone learns at different rates whether animal or human.”

“When we started doing this we vowed to not turn into one of those money hungry training companies,” Dan adds, “So if Thor does need any additional training, we wouldn’t assume it’d be with us.”

Phil swallows back a laugh.

“Just keep going, he’s getting there.” Zoe leans down to pet Thor’s head before both she and Dan head over to Dodie and Toffee, who have been unashamedly watching the entire time.

\--

Phil re-enters the room ten minutes later after lying that Thor had a bathroom emergency, when in reality he was just leaning against the wall outside staring up at the sky whilst Thor pulled on his lead trying to chase butterflies.

He enters to everyone’s stares, and the other owners and dogs sitting on chairs at the back of the room, listening to something Zoe and Dan were clearly in the middle of saying. He quickly shuffles over to an empty seat and tries his hardest to calm Thor’s barks and restrain him from pulling towards the other dogs.

“So yeah, you all did amazing today and we’ll see you next week!” Dan concludes, and the owners get to their feet and begin to leave, thanking Zoe and Dan as they go. Dodie tells Phil that she’ll text him before she leaves with Toffee, and Phil sighs and gets to his feet. Thor immediately begins pulling towards the door.

Zoe leaves in a rush too, having plans with her parents, leaving Dan, Phil and Thor.

“Sorry it seems like I’m not doing anything…” Phil nods towards Thor, and Dan shakes his head.

“He’s just excited around people.” Dan lifts his index finger. “Thor, sit.”

Thor sits immediately and wags his tail, waiting for Dan’s next command.

“See?” Dan smiles.

“Give yourself more credit, he’s learned a lot already.”

Phil tightens Thor’s lead around his hand and turns towards the door. “Thanks again.”

“Phil?”

With one hand on the door, Phil turns back to face Dan, who takes a step closer.

“Yeah?”

Thor looks from one man to the other.

“You probably already have plans but I thought I’d ask anyway, are you free on Saturday?”

“Always assume I’m free all the time. If I’m not working I’m at home binge watching some kind of show with Thor.”

Dan smiles, and his gaze darts to the floor.

“Zoe gave me these tickets a couple of months ago to this dance show her brother’s in, and I wondered if you’d want to go.”

“Me?”

“You’re the only Phil I know.”

As if encouraging him, when Phil looks down at Thor, he’s sat politely, staring.

“I,” Phil swallows thickly, “I’ll have to see if my mum can watch Thor for the night.”

Dan looks evidently dejected. “Of course, I just thought I’d ask.”

His throat suddenly closes up, and all he can do is nod and then get the hell out of the building as fast as his legs can carry him, feeling constantly on the brink of throwing up.

The feeling doesn’t go away until he makes it home, and slides down the front door after letting Thor off of his lead, the puppy immediately sprinting away to pick up a toy. He looks down at his phone, not having lit up with a notification in hours, and tosses it around in his hands.


	13. Thirteen.

“There’s a reason I do everything online.” Phil continues to mutter to himself as he strolls around yet another clothes shop, pulling random shirts off the rails in the hopes he likes one enough.

“I hate everything,” he continues to mutter as he puts the latest shirt back, and runs a hand through his hair.

He’s just about to head for the exit when he spots Dodie, walking through the shop and sipping happily on a cup of bubble tea. Instinctively, Phil tries to duck behind a particularly baggy shirt he hastily pulls off of the rail, but it’s as if Dodie has a Phil-radar, as she almost immediately spots him, and begins walking over, already smiling almost knowingly.

“Whatcha doing?” She asks sweetly, but she can’t fight the smirk on her lips.

“Just, you know, buying a new shirt.”

Dodie nods. “Interesting. Any particular reason?”

Phil turns away momentarily, to take a deep breath and hope his improv has improved since last time.

“A guy can never have too many shirts.”

It comes out as lamely as he’d expect. Dodie presses her lips together to suppress a laugh.

“You never struck me as a Hawaiian shirt kind of guy.” She reaches to take the baggy shirt from Phil’s hands and puts it back on the rail, and turns back to Phil with her free hand on her hip. “Where did he invite you?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Again, as lame as he expected.

“Whatever you say, blushy.” Dodie pats Phil’s heated cheek. “Pro tip, though, go for one like this, makes your eyes pop.” She pulls a simple white patterned shirt off the rail and hands it over, and Phil mentally kicks himself for not spotting it earlier.

“I hate that you have a Phil-radar, but I can’t hate that you know how to dress.”

Dodie shrugs. “It’s more like a bumbling idiot with a crush radar,” Phil rolls his eyes playfully and Dodie laughs, “But it’s my pleasure.”

“Expect a picture before I leave so you can tell me if I look like absolute shit.”

“Or I can do you one better.”

\--

“These?” Phil steps out of his room for the fourth time, and Dodie looks down at his shoes and screws up her nose for a second. Thor, from his position on her lap, cocks his head to the side, as if also judging his choice of footwear.

“Is it dark in there?”

Phil sighs and goes back in and pulls out another pair of shoes from the bottom of his wardrobe. At least this experience has taught him fashion is not a field that interests him.

Dodie simply looks down at his next choice and smiles sadly.

“Can you just choose?” Phil asks, and Dodie laughs before nodding and walking over to the wardrobe, and ends up pulling an old pair of shoes that Phil had pretty much forgot he owned, and had only worn at max twice.

“Thank me when you’re knee deep in-“

“Stop right now or get the fuck out of my house.”

Dodie holds up her hands and laughs again. “Received. But it’s kind of my speciality, being able to get other people laid but not myself.”

“I didn’t know we were quite _there_ yet, to be able to discuss getting laid.”

“I’d be inclined to agree if you and my dog’s trainer didn’t drool over each other at every lesson.”

At this, Phil rolls his eyes.

“No denial, huh? Good to know you’re wising up.” Dodie smirks and pats Phil’s shoulder. “Let me know when you get home safe, regardless of whose home it is.”

And with that, she blows a kiss and leaves, and Phil flops down on the sofa, resting against the headrest, and Thor immediately jumps up and sprawls across his lap, and tries to playfully nibble Phil’s fingers as he attempts to stroke the puppy’s head.

“I think we were growing out of that,” Phil mumbles, and Thor rolls onto his back in response, tongue lolling out of his mouth.

Phil strokes his belly as he scrolled through his phone, wondering how he was going to pass six hours, as he was already ready to go.

\--

_Dodie: have fun on your date!_

_Phil: Not a date_

_Dodie: I repeat, have fun on your date!_

_Phil: you’re exhausting_

_Dodie: play your cards right and I won’t be the only one you say that to tonight_

_Phil: I’m leaving now_

_Dodie: for your date!_

He won’t lie and say it doesn’t relieve some of the anxiety he feels as he walks towards the theatre.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ew filler chapter gross

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!! Please subscribe and leave a kudos and comment letting me know what you thought!
> 
> Twitter; @bloggerhowell
> 
> Tumblr; cafephan


End file.
